13-Monsters of Halloween

Happy Halloween

Last year I created 31 Monsters of Halloween. These are my thirteen favorites. Enjoy!

Ms. Crugly

Ms. Crugly has the old house at the top of the hill. The old place that all the kids in town are convinced is haunted.
Many a boy in the neighborhood has lost his baseball in there. Once Kevin Slapenski thought he heard the house burb after eating his brand new kick ball. It's said that a group of kids went into the house to recover some baseballs. They were greeted by Ms. Cugley welcoming them in with warm cookies and ice cold milk. Some of the kids ran out screaming "It's a trap!!!". Some, like myself, couldn't resist and just had to try the cookies. They were the best cookies I had ever tasted. So what if they turned me into a mouse.

Gary the Cyclops

Gary used to be known as Gary the peeping tom until someone poked him in the eye.

The Garlax

Not known for their fresh breath. You often find a Garlax ready to pounce you the morning after an Italian dinner when you forgot to brush your teeth the night before. The best way to repell a Garlax . . . Listerine.

Miss Shissper the school librarian

Miss Shissper is the school librarian. Sure we have computers but she prefers the card catalogs, micro-phish and the dewy decimal system. Don't talk too loud, mess up a book or get anything out of order. Rumor has it she'll eat your brain.

Magically Delicious

Magically Delicious started his career as a cereal mascot. The cereal didn't do very well. Focus groups said a green and blue hairy monster just wasn't cute enough to sell cereal to kids. Disgruntled he went into the scare business.

Lenny the evil carnival balloon

Lenny is that balloon you got at the theme park or carnival that kept trying his best to get away.
If he did escape your clutches, because you were distracted by the cotton candy, he laughed and laughed that evil helium balloon laugh all the way into the stratosphere. 
If by some chance your mom tied him to your wrist he would constantly aggravate your dad by bobbing up and down in the rearview mirror all the way home. His favorite prank was floating into your room while you were sleeping. You would awaken to Lenny floating across the room. Gripped by shear terror that the Bell Witch was back for revenge you would pass out till morning. The next day Lenny was sitting in your floor lifeless. 
Evil balloons have a short life span.

Cragquarium

Part shellfish, part diver helmet, part fishbowl. Put those together with a monkey suit and you have CRAGQUARIUM the most outlandish B-Mobie monster of all time. Yes I said mobie thats no typo. Well it is, but it was on purpose. B-Mobies are even worse than B-movies, because they were filmed by people who accidently erased them before they could ever be show to audiences, who would have demanded their money back. 

Cragquarium was the forerunner and inspiration for many of the slow lumbering monsters to appear in later sci-fi and horror movies of the 50's and 60's.

FrankenFurry

As a P.R. stunt after the whole Frankenstein monster debacle Dr. Frankenstein created FrankenFurries.
Kids everywhere wanted one. People just loved these rejuvenated bunnies. 
Once again Dr. Frankenstein was back in the good graces of his community. He expanded the FrankenFurries line to include Lamas, Aardvarks and Komodo Dragons but none had the appeal of the bunny. His good standing wasn't long lived. Other mad scientist got into the game of creating there own line of mutated beasts for kids. Foreseeing this outcome the Doctor had predisposed his FrankenFurries to destroy knockoff brands. When people carrying there Frankenfurries met up with someone walking the knockoff brand . . . well let's just say it wasn't pretty.

Lloyd the Deadly Cricket

Lloyd works in a bait shop from which no fisherman has ever returned.

The Gaussian Blur

Never successfully photographed all we have are fuzzy pictures of this furry beast.

Glazed Donut of Doom

She woos you with her seductive sweetness but don't be fooled she goes straight to the hips and keeps those jeans sprayed on tight.

The Floating Hat

In 1853 Dr. Remus Van Shelton was experimenting with a formula that would turn him invisible. He worked tirelessly to come upon the right formula. During this process he invented many products we now enjoy like colorless tape, the door knob and the elastic wastband. The closest he ever got to the forumla that would turn him invisible was getting his derby to float several inches off his head.

Freddie Monster

Freddie was a child actor that played on the short lived but highly acclaimed 50's Sitcom "Monster in the House".
The show was about a normal family that brings home a baby monster after a hospital error. These days Freddie leads a good life going to conventions and reprising his role in his off broadway play. "Monster in the House the off broadway play". He also owns a chain of TV repair stores in Cleveland.